Community

We are in a time of great change and unnerving uncertainty.

This statement may resonate, however it is redundant. This is a time of change, as is every time, every day, and every moment. The one constant that we have is, in fact, change. And with change comes uncertainty which is more often than not, unnerving.

Currently it seems the world is under the thumb of Covid 19, which is news to no one, I’m sure. And with our lives in duress we are living in seemingly much isolation. I cannot, however, with the current circumstance not see the community that is present.

When a new client enters my office and discusses their struggle with depression or anxiety or whatever other ailment is currently present, I automatically know that they know of a life without the presence of named ailment. If we were born depressed and lived depressed, how would we fully comprehend a state of depression as anything other than normalcy? So with this current state and those discussing their frustrations with isolation and social distance, it means we must know connection and community.

It has pained me greatly both to witness and to hear stories of greed and selfishness in this vulnerable time. However, because we can identify selfishness we can identify selflessness, as well as generosity in addition to greed. The pendulum does not swing in only one direction; distress can bring out the less desirable as well as the most ideal in humanity.

This time is uncertain, of course, and without control over the outside world or others we are resigned to merely control ourselves when possible. In the face of this reality, I would like to invite you to control your perspective: notice that this time is uncertain AND, notice that time is always uncertain. We are never certain of the days events or how our lives will unfold. Familiarity provides a facade of certainty, but it isn’t so. Our current state is only exacerbating our view of our lack of control, but it is not creating it. You are in no more or no less control of the Earth on which you reside than you were last week, last month, or last year. And though your ideas of your capabilities and potential have perhaps changed, again your perspective can also.

I have heard mumbles, complaints, and concerns about the rules put into place, about the media, about other citizens, and about the state of the world. As Lao Tzu said, “If you need rules to be kind and just… this is a sure sign that virtue is absent.” If we look at rules as limitations and restrictions, we are at the mercy of our ego and penalties, living in isolation and separation from the community. If we look at rules as mechanisms for kindness and justice, we are operating to be in harmony with our community. For example, if we look at stopping at a red light to avoid a ticket, it’s an inconvenience. If we look at stopping at a red light to ensure the safety and longevity of our community, including ourselves, it is both kind and just. If we look at social distancing and unemployment as forced upon us compromising our safety, we are frustrated, fearful, and alone. If we see social distancing and unemployment as a method to ensure safety of our community, of healthcare workers and hospitals, of our loved ones and strangers, of those infected and those not, we are kind, just, and united.

We, our community, are a whole, that is greater than the sum of its parts. This does not mean we are perfect or that all is going to fit our definition of what is alright or ideal. But as we see the undesirable in our loved ones AND deem them lovable, let us see this state as what it is: both difficult and possible. And see that we are not alone….

In the midst of the current state, if you need someone to talk to, feel free to reach out and I will gladly provide Telehealth therapy. I’ll ask $40, but I will slide and I won’t turn anyone away in need, regardless of ability to pay. Be safe and well.